My poll ratings were coming down, so I decided to change my ethnicity.

I go to work naked everyday.


At 12:30, I always take a nap for a half hour. I promptly resume working at 12:45


I was offered a cash prize of ten dollars from one institution, and a cash prize of eight dollars from another. The catch is, I can only accept one of the prizes. So, naturally, I accepted the eight dollar prize, and left the ten dollar prize on the table.


I asked the cashier, “Do you sell gum?”

He responded, “Dat…”

I said, “What?”

He responded, “Agah…”

I responded, “I see. Thank you very much.”


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